Are You Too Creepy To Be Coupled? Stalk Your Crush Online And We’ll Tell You!

Created by Pooja on April 2, 2018

1Okay, stalker, pick your method of madness. How do you prefer to get your creep on?

Facebook
Twitter
Instagram

2Hey, if you're putting forth all this effort... what are you looking for anyway?

I want to see if they’re dating someone
I want to see if we have anything in common
Any red flags! I want to know!
Absolutely anything and everything I find is gold to me!

3Are you going to send them a friend request or keep your digital distance?

Friending them was the first thing I did!
No, I prefer to admire them from afar.
I’ll send a request, but I’m sure they won’t notice it anyway…

It's not catfishing if you don't get caught! If you were to gain access to their social media information, you're gonna need a convincing alias. Who do you disguise yourself as on the internet?

4It's not catfishing if you don't get caught! If you were to gain access to their social media information, you're gonna need a convincing alias. Who do you disguise yourself as on the internet?

A friend from elementary school from their old town they moved from when they were 10
A meme or parody account
An Instagram model

5'Fess up, weirdo. When's the last time you checked your crush's social media profiles?

Earlier this week
A few days ago
I’m constantly refreshing their feed

6You just stalked yourself into a treasure trap! The internet says your crush is going to an event near you. What's your move?

Go and drag a friend, too!
RSVP on social media, too, and hope they see
Text them and ask if they want a plus one

There are bound to be other casualties of your stalking. Who in their circle do you accidentally also know everything about due to your unsolicited sleuthing?

7There are bound to be other casualties of your stalking. Who in their circle do you accidentally also know everything about due to your unsolicited sleuthing?

Their siblings
Their best friend
Their best friend

8Oooh yes! You just found out that an acquaintance of yours is mutual friends with your crush! What should you do now?

Comment on your mutual’s posts ASAP
Commandeer an in-person hangout with this acquaintance so you can get more info
Name drop that acquaintance in every conversation you have with your crush
Not much, you don’t talk to that acquaintance that much anymore

9Oooh no! You just accidentally clicked like on something way down their timeline. It's super incriminating... now what?

Click unlike super quick and hope they don’t get the notification
Shrug it off, it happens! Their profile is public!
Embrace it and add a comment while you’re at it

10What's the most extreme thing you've done or seen in the name of a good love-and-obsession-fueled stalking session?

Found their home address and committed it to memory
Read all the way back to the end of all their timelines and social media feeds
Stumbled upon old news from their childhood, like a little league win

How DARE they! You're pretty sure the person standing next to your crush in this tagged photo is their significant other. Maybe! Who do you think it truly is, though?

11How DARE they! You're pretty sure the person standing next to your crush in this tagged photo is their significant other. Maybe! Who do you think it truly is, though?

Probably their best friend, right?
A sibling?
Stalk them and find out for yourself!

12Did you know you can outsource your stalking? It's true! Do you have a Google Alert set up for your crush, yes or no?

Yes, I like to stay informed
No, that’s completely insane
No, I prefer to do the majority of the legwork myself

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